I Think I'll Send the Economy a Get Well Card
Posted: Thursday, September 25, 2008
by Timmy Octavian
From bits of news I pick up while
flipping between Law & Order, Project Runway, and Hannah Montana I gather that the economy isn't
doing so well. I don't really know what's wrong with it, maybe it's got that new flu bug
that's going around, but I keep hearing people carrying on at work about something called
Bailout which I assume is some kind of over-the-counter drug that will have the economy out of
bed and back on it's feet in no time. Which is good because I'm pretty sure an unhealthy
economy affects me somehow...
I don't spend much time worrying about
the economy for two simple reasons. (1) I'm poor. When you have very little money you
usually don't pay much attention to subjects that involve money. I mean what's the worst
that could happen? I could getter poorer? Ha Ha Ha. Anyone who thinks that has obviously
never seen my bank account. I routinely take loose change to the Coinstar machine in the
grocery store just so I can get up a few dollars to deposit in the bank so I can make my
minimum account balance. Yes, I know I could just take the change to the bank and deposit it
but the people in the bank hate when you do that. I think bank tellers would rather you
come in and slip them a note that says 'Put the money in a bag, this is a holdup' than for you
to slide them a bag of loose change. I may be poor but I do have a little self-respect left.
Reason Number 2 why I don't worry about
the economy is this: I don't really understand how it all works. I took the required
Economics classes in school but to be quite honest the only cost benefit analysis I was
worried about at the time involved a young lady who sat in front of me and whether or not I could
create a monopoly on touching her assets without showing the hard currency that was
rapidly appreciating in my pants. So now when conversations break out about the
economy instead of being able to participate like a mature adult I find my brain filled only with
booby jokes and a bunch of dirty limericks that start with 'There once was a girl from North
Carolina'...
I assume that one day the economy will
be back on it's feet and all the scare-mongers will have to find something else to talk
about and frighten us with. maybe it'll be terrorism which is always a good one. Or maybe it
will be something environmental like global warming or the total destruction of the ozone
layer. I guess we'll have to just wait and see. You can be sure of one thing however, as
long as there are people on this earth there will be crisis after crisis after crisis and
each one will be blown out of proportion. Each one will be made into mountain when in reality
it's just a lil' ole molehill. Each one for a time will keep the masses cowering in
fearful expectation. And who's to blame for this? Why, bank tellers of course....
Hi Timothy,Thanks for the ecard! I definitely agree when it is said that 'we make mountains out of molehills' Another day, whether rich or poor is a true blessing. It always seems that at election time everything is blown up. Don't feel alone, there have been many times that my husband and I have gone to the trusty ole' coinstar.God bless youThank you for reading my article and for the feedback. I really appreciate it.
A very fun read, Timothy. Thanks for reminding me to cool off a bit about the economy. You're right, the hype never stops. By the way, I'm joining your fan club; please return the favor. ~mogama~Thank you for the feedback. I was actually read a couple of your articles just the other day and I enjoyed them a lot. I'll gladly return the fan club favor.
I fear a condolence card may be required if the 'get well' doesn't work.Great article, Timothy. And welcome to searchwarp.SandraThank you for the feedback Sandra. Glad to be here
Tim
